“She is all soul and vulnerability” – Anaïs Nin
There’s more than just the taste of flesh that keeps me reaching out to you. There’s more than just delighted moans that escape in the middle of nights. There’s so much more and I keep limiting you to just these boundaries. It’s to keep the complications of such causalities to a minimum. I am still a woman, an emotional, sensual, well-aware of what she is doing woman. Well versed in a language I adore and only expect to ever be whispered against skin,yes you are magic but that’s not the only reason why I’m here again. I can clarify any misunderstandings that may arise and keep pacifying you with simple responses, but here I go, when given the opportunity to express myself I shy away and remain defensive. I mean, you must understand that a certain level of protection is needed to continue on this way. The only way I can manage to keep things the way they are is through the maintenance of boundaries. You remember that one night when we spoke softly about the dangers without boundaries, a fearful woman is nothing without her excuses, right? But the truth? The truth is I need you in order to remain sane, in order to remain true to myself because you keep alive the femininity to my being. Does that make sense? With you I reach higher, deeper because you force me and motivate me. There’s inspiration behind your words and your kisses. You unlock doors for me that would have otherwise remained shut had I never took the time to travel with you to lands forgotten. To lands that were neglected, you carried a passion that began to nurture and nourish the soil. Fresh soil feels like silk between fingers and I remembered how revived I felt the moment the lands began to taste water. You inspire growth. You inspire passion and a tenderness that I need and it’s hard for me to let that go because I want to forever belong to you. I never want to have days were I can’t look over to see the liveliness of all that you are. You are a production. A motion that allows me to feel free. I am free. I am me. And I always want to feel this way.
Because of you, I write.